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Showing posts from 2014

Not all Merry & Bright but a Year Full of Grace

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This has been a year of highs and lows, moments that brought me to my knees. We started the year with two houses and financial strain, trusting the old house would sell, trusting we would cover the basics. We left a tight knit community and sat back more than ever before, allowing connections and support to grow slowly. Feeling lonely at times but being surprised at how much closer we became as a family in the process. The buds of connection have the first small leaves, and they are beautiful. The house sold, such deep relief and gratitude. The teen angst descended on our oldest, trying to reconcile the loving brother with the door slamming kid suddenly my size. I prayed for patience and understanding while trying to measure my time between the other 7 and an overworked husband. Then I got sick, really, really sick. The kind of sick that for a day or so was really scary. But man was it humbling. Having meningitis, an infection in your spinal fluid, can be fatal. I thought over mi

Thankful for Mismatched Socks

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Thankful Poem Thankful for noise, because it means children are in the house. Thankful for needing to budget, it makes the treats more meaningful. Thankful for cold to remind me of the beauty of all the seasons and the warmth of a roaring fire.  Thankful for too much to eat, when I know how many go without. Thankful for family fights, with out the fights we would not have the humor of our token ice breakers.  Thankful for mess, I de stress cleaning.  Thankful for mess, it means creativity, good food and make believe. Thankful for scratched floors, it means chairs were dragged to make a fort. Thankful for my husband's cracked hands, it means he has been working hard to support us. Thankful for my softer hands in means hours of hands coated in vaseline inside kitchen gloves scrubbing off the nourishment from the night before. Thankful for hours of laundry, I always wanted a big family. Thankful for crazed Sunday mornings dashing five m

Not All Days are Norman Rockwell

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There were really hard moments last week. We had talked about, in my Nehemiah Bible Study, the gift of difficulty to gain both perspective and gratitude. Sometimes I wish there were an easier way to re set the outlook! I had totally messed up my practice drop off times. Wrong child to wrong gym and then back across town for the next, forgetting to plug the croc pot IN and being totally out of bread or any usable starch for a back up plan! The worst part, was snapping the head off the WRONG child. One just happened to be in the laundry path (trying to clean up a bedding accident moments before a sleepy one needed to hit slumber). Others had been uncharacteristically sassy or rude in the midst of the chaos but this one was just simply THERE. Oh the regret in the moment. And then trying to be calm and let the day go in order to rectify the night. I managed to check in with many of the kids before bed, but not all. There was not a happy ending or a bow tied neatly around the day but we

Veterans Day~ What to Do & How to Talk to Kids!

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Today as we celebrate Veterans day, I wanted to talk to the kids about both what it means to serve and how we can help our troops. Having family serve in the military can be a source of fear and pride. The kids do not have immediate family abroad but have heard from their Grandfathers and family friends about both war and leadership serving in the armed forces. We made a list of what WE could do from home. ~The kids' school has a program to send care packages to the troops. Shop, Ship and Share has lists of helpful things to buy and send to the troops. We got beef jerky, sunflower seeds and baby wipes for the kids to bring in to school for the program. Many locations participate, google to find locally! http://www.minnesotanationalguard.org/press_room/e-zine/articles/index.php?item=4518 ~ http://www.operationgratitude.com Check out for more ideas and programs happening to support our troops. ~Sending Halloween Candy to the troops, google the closest locations. We found a

Happy Birthday Marky!

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As a kid my favorite number was always 9! The year we went to Ireland, the year I could go explore on my bike by myself and the year I started reading TinTin books! Our baby boy, the youngest of the 5 boys, is 9! What a charming, creative and athletic guy he is. Born on election day in 2005 he seems ready to tackle life with joy. Marky 1 year photo in hand me down Nike's & that following summer at 1 1/2. The MnM brothers, Nate 3, Mark 2, Mickey 4 MnM Always found a mess to make Baby blues turned green with age! 8! Fell in love with football, practicing for hours in the yard with his Dad and brothers Our reader, have to sneak in to turn off the light, he falls asleep with books on his head nightly. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARKY!!!

Community, Encouragement and Change

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Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but let us encourage one another" I love the idea of community being a place we can "stir up the good works" of one another. It is very difficult to maintain and foster many individual relationships, and leaving a community can also be painful. Learning how to celebrate the times in one place, such as Elementary school, and moving to another give us a chance to talk about respecting memories while embracing new opportunities. As our children move into their own interests we are finding the need to have time as a family key for a strong community at home.  Our kids have taken over the use of my phone, and Istragram account. I worry about allowing them into these electronic "communities" knowing full well to be in relationship with another person or group can't truly be electronic. Facebook can give way to env

Unplugged in the North Woods Thank You Camp du Nord!

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Over MEA we unplugged! We left our I pads, our computers, we logged out and headed up north. We have attended Camp du Nord summer family camps before, but this was our first time at an Autumn camp. We stayed in Danes, a wonderful old cabin right on the lake. On our way to Ely we stopped to see the Train park in Sudan We ate meals with other families in a Lodge, had nightly fires and each read at least two books. As a family we hiked, played soccer, did a Finnish sauna and carved sticks. Our great Cabin, hours of cozy reading! The view from our cabin James and John chopped enough wood for the winter and Mickey forgot to wear cool socks the whole time. Nate wrote a "North Woods Journal" by Nathaniel T Otis (has a nice literary ring to it doesn't it?) and Mark learned how to skip rocks almost as far as Dad. Mark also had the coolest top bunk bed on chains by the fire. The best bed Jr making one of many, many fires Beautiful lakefront at Camp

What Can I Actually DO at this Phase

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I have had the pleasure of attending two philanthropic events this week, and each has brought into focus the desire for change and taking action. The difficulty is how one goes about doing that in different phases of life. We as a couple can not offer the necessary financial contribution, nor can we dedicate enough time to make the impact we would like at this time of raising children from 3 to 14 years old. I am very aware that I have two years until my youngest starts primary school, this will impact my ability and desire to work. I am in the process of discerning school, graduate program acceptance and transcript request forms are stacked under sports schedules and field trip information sheets. And I am thinking about meaningful work. I am not in a unique place, many, many mothers find themselves at crossroads when their youngest move towards the big yellow bus. Lucy's portrait of her family, she told her teacher she wanted to use extra people and more skin colors to be&q

Anniversary Gratitude

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Anniversaries have come and gone for us without enough pause. We have both been great about cards, and small meaningful things. Some long walks and a few of the last 13 years married, 14 years together, we have made it out of the house but this year was a concerted effort. We made it away, all 8 children were intact upon return. I had posted ideas about restaurants and Sheff wanted me to wait to talk about being gone until we were actually safely home. He is very nonplussed by social media and uses it sparingly and carefully. I can't say I always share his perspective, but in this case I agreed.  Our hidden little both at The Melting Pot, they took our photo and poured champagne. We ended up trying The Melting Pot, fondue restaurant. Really fun sweet date night idea. We usually go for as spicy as possible, Japanese or Thai food. This was a good out of our element place to try and  fun to be able to talk about our parents fondue parties of the 1070s, we were musing that the w

Why it Might be Important to Care About What Other People Think

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Driving, carpooling and late night talks give way to conversations with my teen, preteen and elementary school age kids and their friends. Fall tryouts, tense games and new middle school dynamics make for constant backseat chatter. A phrase I heard often this week was "Why do you care what people think?" This made me wonder when we should care about what others think. As a culture overall I would argue we have gone too far in the direction of individualism. Not caring about how our actions impact others, impact the earth and choosing the image of self (selfies) over community. There are times when doing your own thing, trusting your gut or running with an idea are  commendable. There are also times to listen to other people's opinions, times to allow people you respect to be mirrors for actions in question and times to follow the guidance of another person. On a teenage level there are many opportunities to worry too much about other people's perceptions. Finding

Could we ever host a foreign exchange student?

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We have had two houseguests this week. Two boys who line up with our sixth grader and our third grader, two very nice boys. I was unsure how this would work. I knew the positives were the boys shared classes and activities, and the negatives would be more about how my kids acted. For example, would the boys treat this like a week long playdate? Extra snacks, wanting x box over homework and so on? So far it has actually been just fine, the boys are good kids who are very happy to be caught up in the daily flow of Otis life. After school we always have a fun and a healthy snack. Yesterday orchard apples and candy corn mix, today homemade cookies and cheese sticks. Simple but enough fun to run from bus stop to home to see what is out. The visiting boys figured out this the only snack until dinner and then joined in with homework and getting ready for sports. We have plenty of beds for extras and the boys who gave up their own beds for the guests (John and Nate re located) think is fun t

Week one: Re-entry time

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When one of the eight has a rare sleepover or is away at camp we always call the first hours home, re-entry. The physical change of adding a body back into the flow of life, the desire of the one away to share their experience while at the same time holding onto the time away as their own, sacred "me" time in a family of ten. Going back to school is always both a re-entry experience for the kids and for parents, especially mom. To get stories, antidotes and obligations sorted out for so many different individuals is down right daunting. Some one needs a family photo, someone needs a different color folder, someone's teacher wanted proof we are actually related to Amelia Earhart (we are), someone outgrew their back to school shoes (in two weeks, how?!) and absolutely everyone needs money. The first four days I have cried, celebrated, calculated, prayed and navigated with the kids. I have missed my workouts and missed my friends. I have attempted to be calm, all knowin

Happy Birthday to the Otis Dad!

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For his birthday Sheff is getting a ridiculously gooey monster cake from the kids, with a side of minnie mouse cupcakes from Lulu. Some snapshots of an amazing father, a fantastic husband and a man who's patience, fair mindedness and enthusiasm make the world a better place.  We love you Sheffer/Dad!! Aug 27 2014 Family first Many little ones have gone to sleep this way:) Teaching 5 sons how to be a man A man who loves holding babies, did our nighttime feedings around here. Working out with babies as weight 2007 A outdoorsman and his ballerina 2009 Date night! One coming up, we will make it happen for our 13th anniversary this year, pinkie promise. And goal to do an overnight away from the kids before we hit 15 years:) We always miss them so maybe 15 is about right but great long walks in the dark to fit it in, runs, hikes, Sunday morning church as a family, the little Japanese noodle shop we love with sake and black coffee ea

State Fair Time!

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Matching in Yellow off to the state fair 2007 Snow cones at the state Fair in 2010 Sate Fair 2013 2014 2014 James now serves as the "adult" to take the little girls on rides!

Taking time for conversations about suicide

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When Robin Williams committed suicide my first thought, as I am sure many people had, was of his daughter. My worry in the moment was that she would feel that her love was not enough. The way it was covered, the way the story was reported may have been tactless, but it was also very real. There is no glamour in suicide and unfortunately no privacy. I do not believe suicide is selfish and I do believe the first reaction should be compassion. Compassion for those left behind and compassion for the pain in others we are not privy to. I hope this man's death, suffering and legacy creates inlets of change. I would venture to say for the person suffering they are thinking this is the only way to stop the pain, and perhaps this collective societal loss will allow more people access to help. My biological father committed suicide when I was in college. Very few people knew about this at the time, even some of my roommates did not know. I had been living with a friend in Alaska and had to